Bribery & Fashion

Today I swallowed my pride & bribed Ainsley to wear a dress with a matching sweater for school pictures.  (Spiderman toy in exchange for a dress.)


Why do I stoop to such levels?  Please see the following:

Ainsley still loves "stripes on stripes," regardless of the color.

Boots & shorts 

(don't worry, we didn't let her leave the house like this)

She still LOVES tie-dye.  

(I still don't.)

Thanks Auntie Julie for bringing more tie-dye!

Now she loooves peace signs too!

Why would you wear the matching shirt to the skirt when you could proclaim your love for soccer instead?

The monochromatic "my-favorite-color-is-blue" look:

And my personal favorite, tie-dye & stripes.  Awesome.

Where have we been?

I have no excuse for not updating the blog - just busy with my little monsters.  Here's a recap of what we've been up to the past few months:

Max continues to use his dimples to get out of trouble.

Ainsley is totally & completely obsessed with dinosaurs. She wore this hat for 9 hours.

Max & Ainsley are still best buddies, even though they fight constantly. Here they are playing "swim lessons" wearing "goggles" & "swim caps" (aka-hats made by Granny).



Max will still do anything for a laugh.



Ainsley made it through a dental checkup without having a panic attack...



...and Max completed his first dental visit with no tears, no hesitation - it was a miracle! Ainsley prepped him for a month - big sisters are the best! (I'm hoping she'll potty-train him, too!)



Costco finally started carrying Diet Mountain Dew - making Brad a very happy man. 



I took the kids to a "Rapunzel" puppet show - Mommy should have found out if there was a "scary witch" because Max was NOT fond of her in any way. Now he is suspicious of all puppets - see above.



Ainsley made a worm puppet, named Andy, after the puppet show. 



Taking after his sister at age 2, Max reminded us about "safety first" & donned a bike helmet during lunch.



Ainsley still makes us laugh with her wardrobe choices.



Auntie Julie came to visit & brought these LOVELY tank tops. A "Muscle Beach" tank & another tie-dye frock are really things I wanted in their closets. Of course they both LOVE them.



Ainsley continues to show us her "creative" side - especially when she's alone in her room during "rest time." This particular day she decided to make her own kite & try to fly it with the wind from her ceiling fan. She couldn't understand why it wouldn't fly & was very mad about this & for some reason it was my fault. 



Another day she decided to make her closet into her clubhouse. You had to have an invitation to gain entry-it's very exclusive.  She slept there for 2 or 3 nights.



This is my personal favorite: Instead of cleaning up her room, Ainsley decided she would stack all of the toys on her floor in one basket & turn it into a castle for kids to snowboard in. Seriously? I had no response so I just took a picture.



We've also been enjoying the unseasonably warm weather. On this day Max & Ainsley were hitting our tree with tennis rackets & butterfly nets to "make it snow," then would attempt to slide in the grass on our saucers & toboggan. They couldn't figure out why they wouldn't go fast "like with regular snow."



Ballet cowgirl Woody - Ainsley still loves "Toy Story" & ballet & dressing up like Woody.



We celebrated Granny Thea's birthday by sticking 25 flamingos in her yard. It was pretty funny (but it was freezing out!)



Ainsley started the spring soccer season & is having a great time. We're not sure if she likes playing soccer or wearing her penguin soccer socks more (her team is called the "Princess Penguins").



We've had lots of fun visitors this winter. Max loved playing with Ronan Will, 2 yrs, who was visiting from California.



Ainsley & Max love baby Kaitlin Schorgl, born in January, who is a frequent visitor.



Ainsley even got to hold baby Rosalie, Ronan's little sister. It was so special to see Auntie Annie & her kiddos!



We are also pretty obsessed with firefighters!  Firefighter Uncle Rich has been writing us lots of letters telling us all about what it's like to be a firefighter in Northern California. He even sent us his badges-see above!



Firefighter Ainsley



No brother-sister firefighting duo would be complete without matching firefighter jammies, right?
Please check back more frequently - hopefully I'll be updating this more often!

Who ARE Those Boys?

"Ainsley, who do you think is in this picture?"

"Ummmmm, Uncle Joshie & Uncle Andrew?"

And that, my friends, PROVES that my sister & I had the WORST haircuts IN THE HISTORY OF ALL TIME from 1984-1991.

[In 1991 we staged a coup & started doing our own hair - this was also tragic - my styling "tricks" included a LOT of hairspray & a curling iron & Julie **gasp** talked my mom into a perm.]

My mom claims this was the super-stylish Dorothy Hamill look, but since I wasn't an ice skater, nor an Olympic aficionado, its popularity was lost on me. 


Back to the conversation with my 4-year-old about this AH-MAZING picture:

"Ainsley!  That's Mommy & Auntie Julie!!  That's us when we're little!"

"Where?  Are you hiding behind Uncle Josh & Uncle Andrew?" (she is dead serious.)

"No.  That is us!  THAT is Julie,"  I say, pointing to my little white-haired "brother" in the photo that is sure to go viral, as you are reading this, under the google search terms "child abuse."

"Well, why do you guys have haircuts that are for a boy?" 

Hmmmm, good question, Ainsley.    

We totally had boy haircuts.  Yes, I looked like a boy.


That's why my mom let me get my ears pierced about 2 hours after someone called me a "little boy" at the library when I was in the 3rd grade, emotionally scarring me for life.  


No questions asked - I left the library in tears & I think my mom drove me straight to the mall to get my ears pierced.

In my mom's defense, when I told her that Ainsley thought we were her uncles, she went on & on about the "quality" of our  hairdos: 


"I only took you girls to a hairdresser who was really 'with it.'  She took her time and really did a nice job on your hair.  That haircut was very stylish at the time."

Really?  


I wonder if this hairdresser was the same lady who told my mom that cow & bear sweatshirts were in style too - because you better believe that Julie & I are wearing our "nicest" sweatshirts in that photo.  

"Ok, we done now?"

The morning of our family photos (our first!), Max smiled for about 4 "say cheese"-es, then asked "Ok, we done now?" & headed back into the house:

Where's Waldo--er, Max?

It was pretty funny & wasn't lost on our fabulous photographer, Katie Trenkle http://designedbykt.blogspot.com/.  

I had no expectations for this photo shoot, just wanted to get a photo of all of us glancing in the same vicinity. 

Even the outtakes from our shoot turned out well - at the end, Max took off on his trike & Ainsley pulled her bow out to let down her hair & enjoy her long-promised (bribed?) lollipop.


Thanks for a fun morning, Katie!

Sugar Highs & Wardrobe Malfunctions

Look at all of that money sunk into Disney costumes-amazing & revolting!

Another Pixar-victory at the Yeretsky house: 

October was officially "Toy Story" month & I couldn't be happier to retire those Woody & Buzz costumes now that Halloween is OVER. 

Buzz Lightyear at his best.

Eight days after Halloween, we think Max has come down off of his sugar-high, although this has not been confirmed.  He has been a DISASTER!

  

By the end of trick-or-treating, Max was asking people, with a lollipop hanging out of his mouth like a cigarette,  "When I eat all my candy, [can] I come back [to] your house & you give me [the] rest of yours?"  

(It sounds a lot funnier if you say it in his little New York accent voice that doesn't pronounce the "r"s - call me if you need a live rendition.)  

While he impressed many middle-aged ladies in our neighborhood, others in the Yeretsky clan did not fare so well.  

The kids talked me into being Jessie, Woody's cowgirl buddy from the "Toy Story" movies.  My friend Austyn, crafty gal that she is, loaned me her homemade Jessie costume from last year.

Hey peanut gallery: hold your "Emmymoo"comments.

Now, most people would try on a costume a few days, maybe even a few hours before they are expected to wear it.  Not me.  Don't have time.  I'm busy thinking about doing laundry, thinking about cooking dinner, or other domestic things I should be doing.   

So, Halloween afternoon rolls around & I put the Jessie cowprint chaps on, then I put on the cowprint vest.  

Funny, I think, this vest is quite large.  In fact, very large.  In fact, so large, that when I wear it with the chaps, I look like a cow.  Oh well, I assume it goes with the costume & go on my merry way.  

Five minutes before we are leaving to trick-or-treat it dawns on me that Jessie doesn't wear a vest.  I grab Ainsley's Jessie doll - nope she wears a white button-down shirt with yellow on the cuffs.  

This isn't Jessie's freaking vest but it's the vest Austyn's mom made for her husband when he dressed up as Woody.  Dear lord.  I do look like a cow.  

And don't worry, that point was NOT lost on my neighbors.  One of my neighbors followed me around our little parade telling me I was "so bovine" & how he would "try not to milk me tonight."  Sick.  Yes, that really happened.  

Next year I'm going as a witch.

I Hate You Pixar.

I've won a lot of battles in this house, but this week Ainsley officially won the war.  

No, Pixar won the war.    

Please see Exhibit A:

Ainsley's newly painted bedroom-she requested "a boy's color"-we settled on yellow.

If you are not familiar with the above Space Ranger (consider yourself lucky),  that would be a 3-FOOT TALL BUZZ LIGHTYEAR WALL DECAL that stares me down every time I walk out of her room, smugly saying, "Gotcha!  You lose, Mom, I run the show now!"  

Buzz is taller than my 2-year-old & almost as big as the room's occupant.  Brad had to follow instructions to put him together.  I'm pretty sure Ainsley will be 10 before he comes down. 

And the worst part?

I BOUGHT THAT DAMN THING WILLINGLY.  

At Costco.  

So you know what that means?  

There are about 25 other little annoying Toy Story gang members that will eventually take over that wall & also stare at me, reminding me what a sucker I am & the money I have wasted away on Toy Story movies, toys, coloring books, potty training rewards & this month, Halloween costumes (Ainsley is Woody & Max is Buzz).  

I once had dreams of beautiful stencils in Restoration Hardware paint colors that coordinated gorgeously with her pink quilt.  

Dream gone.  

I hate you Pixar.  

You produce kiddie crack & should be ashamed of yourself. 

(p.s. I just heard that Steve Jobs started Pixar - in no way am I bashing him - he is fabulous & will be missed - do not send me hate e-mail please)

How To Make Your Kid's Teacher Hate You...

Ainsley excited for her first day of Pre-K - warning: do NOT call it Pre-School!

...by picking her up 30 minutes late on the first day of school.  

Yep, that's what I did.  

Now, I'm not going to blame it on the school's somewhat confusing schedule, because honestly, I spent 3 years in Law School preparing to dominate the Pre-K pickup schedule.

Not to brag, but I'm a master at carpool, grape slicing & stain removal & can only credit those skills to that juris doctor degree that certainly pays off every single day.  (It does Brad, it does!!)   

What I do blame for my tardiness is the blissful state I was in that day.

Not only was Ainsley in school all day long, but so was Max!  (He refused to be photographed because "It fee-zing, Mommy, it fee-zing!"  It was 72 degrees.)

I think the school saw the desperation in my eyes & agreed to let Max start Parents Day Out in September instead of waiting until November when he turned 2 1/2.  

I know, I know, how could I ever get sick of this little frat guy, right?

And why did they think I was desperate for a break from my little troublemaker?  

Hmmmm...well, it may have been the bags under my eyes, the baseball hat covering the unwashed hair, or I probably just told them.  

I do have a history for sharing a little more than I should with teaching staff...you may recall the "Max erection" incident - which is NOT about my baby & an erection, so get your minds out of the gutters sickos.  (It is a funny story though:  http://3goingon13.blogspot.com/2010/03/max-has-what.html )

So anyway, on the first day of school it turned out both kids were to be picked up at 2:30 pm.  I picked up Max on time & even saw Ainsley & her teacher, but killed time with Max for 30 minutes because we knew Ainsley wouldn't want to miss any of the exciting Pre-K action.  

Whoops.  That action ended at 2:30 & we found Ainsley following her teacher around, setting up for the next day (big shocker).  

Some kids would cry, thinking their mom forgot them, my child was thrilled to play teacher for 30 extra minutes.  

And her sweet teacher did her very best to slap on a smile, abstain from giving me dagger eyes & not make a comment about how people should pass a test before they can become parents.

All in all, a great first day of school!

Hell Has Frozen Over

Hell has officially frozen over.

Ainsley ASKED to take a ballet class, TOOK said ballet class & LIKED IT!

Since age 2, I'd ask if she wanted to take a dance class.  


She'd turn her nose up at me & reply a snarky "no!"  Recently it was followed by a "when do my football/karate/violin/baseball/tennis lessons start?"


But not this time.  


My Masterful Mommy Manipulation techniques finally worked: "Ooooh, look at your friend Eileen's leotard, she must have come from dance lessons;" "Wow, look how high Nora can jump, I wonder if she learned that at dance?"


And lo & behold, September 3, 2011 - a day I will always remember:


My little girl, who often requests to be called "Andy" from Toy Story & plans to be Woody for Halloween said, "Mommy, I want to take ballet."  


Success!!!

Tiny Tim

When you are 2 & only weigh 23 pounds you get to do special things - like have your dad & sister shove you in a gift bag so you can repeatedly pop out like a jack-in-the-box for everyone's entertainment. 

* * * * * * * *

This was also the day Max learned to put his shorts on "all by himself."  

He only missed the mark a little, turning said shorts into a backwards loin cloth/skirt-type of thing that he wore around the house all day.  

So close.  So very close, buddy.