Saturday, August 28, 2010

Partners in Crime

Max is 15 months old & dedicated to causing trouble.

For the most part, Ainsley is still a stickler for the rules & plays the first-born role quite well, but they are often off making mischief together.

Who would have thought Max would influence his big sister so much?

This may be the first time they both smiled at the SAME time for the camera - if only Ainsley's hair had been tamed!


Ainsley about to push her brother across the room at high speeds, hoping he doesn't crash into a cabinet, thus drawing attention to the trouble they are about to get into.


"I can feed Max!"
"I can babysit Max!"
"I can shove that spoon into his mouth & test his gag reflex!"


Max's new trick is climbing on top of every table, saying "mama" to get my attention, then giving himself a round of applause. It never occurred to his sister that she, too, could climb on top of tables. Luckily, he is such a great teacher...


...now they both climb on top of tables.
This is Ainsley's "I'm just holding him!" move which is synonymous with strangling. She just doesn't understand why he doesn't like it.


Watch out for our bike gang.
You never know what kind of trouble they could be up to!



This is pretty much why you will never receive a
Christmas card photo with the 4 of us smiling.
My children have conspired to never let it happen.


They have also conspired to pretty much detest the pool; just proving the point that just because your mom was a swimmer & swim coach & taught swimming lessons & said "my child will never wear water wings" (Ainsley's are pink), that does not mean that her children will love the pool.
Maybe next summer? Maybe if there was one in our backyard? Brad? Please?

Tickle attack on Granny. She should have seen it coming.
These two don't sit still for long - she knows that!

Friday, August 20, 2010

Security Breach


Attention Baby Gate Manufacturer:

Maybe the next time you make a baby gate suggested to be used at the bottom of a staircase, you should consider having a group of 1-year-old boys test it.



It only took Max 5 days to discover how easy velcro comes apart.


His favorite hobby is seeing how quietly he can dismantle the gate & get upstairs.

He is fast like a ninja & Ainsley just runs around the house yelling, "Moooomy, Max is upstairs again!"

Luckily, I borrowed this gate, so I'm not too annoyed, but really, velcro?


Friday, August 13, 2010

The Firefighters Will Spray Me, Mom!

Honestly, I thought Leawood's bravest would be summoned to our house a lot sooner - somehow, we managed to wait until July.

Our carbon monoxide alarm went off & apparently the gas company sends the fire department.

At the very least, I thought this would be exciting for my kids.

"Look, Ainsley! The fire fighters are in front of our house. Look at the big fire engine!"

"Nooooooo, MOOOOOMMMMYY!" she screamed, clinging to me. "I don't want them to spray me!!!!!!!!"

"They are not here to spray you! Calm down, it's ok! You don't have to look at the fire truck. It's ok!"

What kid is afraid of a fire truck? Apparently
mine. Mine is very afraid.

"Ma'am, how can we get into the house?" Mr. Firefighter in charge asks.

"You can go through the garage."

"Ma'am, we just tried that. That door is locked, ma'am."

Seriously? One week after I lock Max in the car, another door locks on me? I am not "blaming" anyone, but I think a certain 3-year-old locked us out.

Why must door-locking drama follow me everywhere I go? Good lord!

So the firefighters spend 15 minutes breaking my door open, only to tell me that I need a new battery for my carbon monoxide detector. Awesome - just a new battery. (And yes, I am glad my house didn't blow up.)

"Ma'am, opening locked doors is good practice for us. Just your taxes at work. Do you have a new 9 volt battery, Ma'am?" Mr. Firefighter asks with a smile.

Ok, 1.) Enough with the "ma'am" stuff. I'm possibly 2 years older than you & just because I made my 19-year-old babysitter stay to watch this whole debacle go down does not mean you have to "ma'am" me; and,

2.) You really think I have a new 9 volt battery hanging around? I have enough diapers, food, clothes, AA & AAA batteries to make my house run but no, I cannot produce a 9 volt battery out of thin air right now, sir. I moved in 3 months ago which, for a normal person, is a long time ago, but for me, is like last week.

So Mr. Firefighter produced a new battery from his stash, set aside for crazy Leawood moms who will probably forget to replace the 9 volt.

I'm only slightly humiliated after this experience because I know we will be repeat customers with the fire department.

I almost burned our house down last week when one of Ainsley's silly bands (google it, mom) got stuck to a burner. Fun times.